I wrote this piece, I am not okay, at a pivotal crossroads in my life. These four little words have helped me breakthrough mental, emotional and spiritual blocks in a way I never perceived possible.
Say it with me.
I am not okay...
See that vomit taste you just got in your mouth? See that innate desire to run and hide or send me a long hate-email demanding that I get out of your head and heart!
Yep. I know that feeling. In fact, that feeling and I have been in an intimate relationship for as long as I can remember. We have matching towels.
But here's what I've learned, in a strange turn of events, the more I feel like choking back an emotional vomit or hiding my head in shame under the pillow the closer I am to transforming my life. [This is normally where I shake my fist at the Universe, perverse little thing that it can appear to be.]
It's called being, radically authentic, and it is the the third step on my Beginner's Guide To Transformation.
For the past two weeks I have guided you through the first two steps of my Beginner's Guide To Transformation. In week one we faced our ill-advised desire to control our transformation process. We began the work of releasing our resentment and judgement of things that are out of control, in order to move closer to a peace and serenity of what is in our control.
"I now release my desire to control this practice and its outcomes."
In week two we affirmed that we are no more or less important than anything or any person in the Universe. We are all an interconnected aspect of the whole. We are free to live our best life, but only if we can acknowledge all the ways we've used people or things to fill a void within us.
"I now affirm that I nurture my own growth and development"
Don't just say it. SCREAM IT!
Now it's time for Step 3.
LINDSEY'S BEGINNER GUIDE TO SELF-TRANSFORMATION CONTINUED
STEP 3: RADICAL AUTHENTICITY
My Dear Soul-Sister or Soul-Brother, it is time to accept yourself as you are - the good, the bad, and the ugly. Come out from behind that mask.
Go ahead and say it...
I am not okay.
You are not the things you own.
You are not the person you are dating or married to.
You are not the clothes you wear.
You are not your job.
You are not the things you've said.
You are not things you've done.
You are neither the mask of success you wear, or the unworthy individual you believe you are. Come out from behind your shame and learn to accept yourself as you are.
There is hope and grace for you here, and the path forward begins with the practice of radical authenticity - the practice of truthfulness. You must be radically truthful with yourself, your family, your friends, your community. It starts with being radically authentic when asked, "Hey, how are you?" Try telling the truth for once.
I am not okay.
But I think it's okay, I am not okay...
Stay tuned for next week.
STEP 4: SURRENDER
"We are each a work in progress!"
Lindsey T H Jackson is a Life Coach, movement therapist and spiritual guide
. Contact her at www.lindseythjackson.com for inspiration, list of services and bookings.